


Fly

by sharedwithyou



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types, Thor (Movies), Thor - All Media Types
Genre: Angstangstangst, But Loki Does What He Wants, Childhood Possibly Ruined, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Loki Needs a Hug, Mindfuck, More angst, Read at your own discretion, Reader-Insert, So Loki Doesn't Get a Hug, Triggers, WHY CAN'T I LET MY LOVELIES BE HAPPY
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-18
Updated: 2015-07-18
Packaged: 2018-04-09 21:22:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,706
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4364651
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sharedwithyou/pseuds/sharedwithyou
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>WARNING: TRIGGERS/CHILDHOOD RUINATION</p><p>THIS MAY RUIN YOUR CHILDHOOD</p><p>BUT IT IS A BEAUTIFUL FIC</p><p> </p><p>“If I wish hard enough?”</p><p>“Yes, sweetie.”</p><p>“Even if I don’t have any wings?”</p><p>“That’s right.”</p><p>“Oh, wow.”</p><p>“I know. Exciting isn’t it?!”</p><p>“Now, now (y/n). I think Loki has enough of an imagination as it is.” </p><p>“Yes, Queen Frigga.” You obliged shyly as you tucked the blankets around the young prankster and the Allmother came in to kiss her son goodnight.</p><p> </p><p>“You were wrong, you know.”</p>
            </blockquote>





	Fly

**Author's Note:**

> AS;LDFJASLDFJ;SLKDJF;ALSJDF;LAKSJD FEELS FEELS FEELS ANGSTANGSTANGST SADSADSAD POSSIBLE MINDFUCKS
> 
> SERIOUSLY THIS IS REALLY SAD AND DEPRESSING AND ANGSTY AND POSSIBLY TRIGGERFUL AND MAY ALSO POSSIBLY RUIN YOUR CHILDHOOD.
> 
> it didn't ruin mine but it was based on a little comic i read that was supposed to be one of those "childhood ruined" memes.
> 
> READ AT YOUR OWN DISCRETION
> 
> if you're willing to take the risk though, this is truly a beautiful piece
> 
> leave me a comment if you enjoyed!!
> 
> XOXO Bucky (Mindfucker, the Lovely)

“If I wish hard enough?”

 

“Yes, sweetie.”

 

“Even if I don’t have any wings?”

 

“That’s right.”

 

“Oh, wow.”

 

“I know. Exciting isn’t it?!”

 

“Now, now (y/n). I think Loki has enough of an imagination as it is.”

 

“Yes, Queen Frigga.” You obliged shyly as you tucked the blankets around the young prankster and the Allmother came in to kiss her son goodnight.

 

“Can Ms. (Y/n) sleep in my room tonight?!” Loki popped out of the blankets quicker than a Prince-of-Mischief-in-a-box.

 

“Don’t you think you’re getting too old for that, Master Odinson?” You teased as you fluffed his raven locks.

 

“She’s right, you know,” the beautiful queen agreed as she pecked him on the forehead.

 

“Please, mother? I promise I’ll be good.” Loki put on his best puppy-eyes.

 

“Well…” He was a mama’s boy after all. “I suppose just this once.”

 

“Oh thank you mother!!” Loki leapt out of bed and clutched Her Highness around the waist.

 

“But only if you go to bed this moment Master Odinson.”

 

“Yes Miss (Y/n)!” The little boy hopped back into his bed and patted the sheets next to him with a beam. You smiled back gently, and the Allmother patted you on the shoulder, before leaving to bid her elder son goodnight.

 

 

“You don’t think I’m too old yet, do you (Y/n)?” He whispered as you busied yourself cleaning the room.

 

“Oh I surely doubt that, Master Odinson.”

 

He folded his arms across his chest. “I told you, when mother and father aren’t around, you should just call me by my name.”

 

“I’m afraid I’ll slip up when they’re around, my dear.” You put his books back on the shelf and blew out the first two candles.

 

“Very well then,” he sighed. “My dear will have to suffice for now.”

 

You laughed at his vocabulary. His manner of speaking was much more sophisticated than his brother’s; but you believed Thor would catch up soon enough. “My dear it shall be, then.”

 

 

“Hey, what about that last candle?” You were about to settle into bed when little Loki spoke up.

 

“It is to ward off the spirits and beasts, is it not?”

 

He pondered a moment. “No, I think we’re better off without it.”

 

“Well, aren’t you brave!” You touched his forehead, before rising again.

 

“Thor still needs his,” he bragged as you headed over to the mantle.

 

“Indeed, he does.” You’d never understand why the Allfather insisted on breeding this rivalry so. But it was his rules, after all. His rule.

 

“Don’t you worry, (Y/n). If any monsters come in the night, I’ll protect you.”

 

“Thank you, Master Odinson.” Your lips parted to blow out the last light.

 

“Loki!” He complained.

 

“Thank you then, Loki.” And with your last breath, the candle was out.

 

 

“You were wrong, you know.”

 

He was looking out the window in the highest floor of the tallest tower, picturesque.

 

You were a ways behind him, watching.

 

As always, watching.

 

“The stories you told, as I fell asleep.”

 

“We.”

 

“Pardon?”

 

“As we fell asleep.”

 

“You are correct. The stories you told, as we fell asleep. They were all bullshit.”

 

You said nothing.

 

“All those secrets, about wishes, happily ever afters, about princes meeting princesses and slaying dragons.”

 

“Child’s play.”

 

“I suppose, I was only a child.”

 

“We.”

 

He yearned to turn and look upon your face; were you forlorn, or angry? Surely you weren’t impassive, as your voice sounded. But he did not.

 

“We were only children, Loki.”

 

“You are to address me with the proper authority.”

 

“As you wish, Master Odinson.”

 

He was silent now.

 

“Or is it Master Laufeyson?”

 

He stiffened.

 

“I think an all-encompassing Your Worship will suffice.”

 

He bit his lip, fumbling for words.

 

But it looked like he would say no more, and it was your turn.

 

 

“What would you have me done?”

 

“I’m sure there’s something grammatically incorrect about that question, (y/n).”

 

“You were always the eloquent one.” You saw him nod curtly and fought a bitter laugh. Instead, you continued.

 

“Would you rather have learned the truth? Whatever that is? Violence, and betrayal? Perhaps death and justice? Jealousy and gluttony?” You left the righteous anger bubbling within you out of your words.

 

“Wishes are for the weak.”

 

“You certainly made yours come true.” You were staring hard into his back now. “Your Highness.”

 

“Perhaps that was the lesson instead. That if you work hard enough, you can make your own wishes a reality.”

 

“This is what you wished for, then?” You lifted your chin so you could see over his shoulder. Though without standing on your tippy toes, you could smell the smoke burning, and hear the angry cries. The vision of destruction was just a lucky bonus.

 

“All things come with a price.” His voice was equally cold, but you knew the guilt writhing within him, a beast he had long since buried and quelled. Was he justifying this to himself or you?

 

“And mine, then?”

 

“It is a dark day when a life comes with a tag, is it not?”

 

“The fires seem to light the skies up just right, Master Odinson.”

 

His tone hardened. “You made your choice, (Y/n).”

 

“Indeed.”

 

“I could have given you everything-“ he cut himself off as he balled his fist and placed it on the windowsill. “But you chose him. Him. Not me.”

 

You shook your head, angry. He was always your first choice. Always had been. But he could only see where you had failed. Not where had he.

 

“The Allfather, The God of Thunder, The Men of So-Called Virtuosity. Always, them. And, now you.”

 

Would you have me betray my country for you, Loki?

 

And even if I could, would you do the same for me?

 

 

But you would not waste those words on him. Not if he refused to see. The fog was meeting the wisps of flame, and his vision was clouded as the sky.

 

 

“They’ll be coming soon.”

 

“The guards.”

 

“My men.” For many had put up a valiant fight; and those who remained were either too cowardly or too blind to resist. These would become your men, Loki. Your legacy precedes you.

 

“And then?”

 

“You knew what the price would be.”

 

“My life, then?” He shivered then, almost giving in to his heart which was turning, turning back to look at you, to ask you one last time if you’d stay.

 

But he did not.

 

 

“My head then?”

 

“Certainly not.” He whipped around now, affronted. “I never said that.”

 

“I just figured-“

 

“Well you were wrong.” There was something like betrayal lurking in his eyes; as if the mere thought that he’d allow that to happen was treachery from you.

 

Oh the irony kills me, My Lord.

 

“My apologies, Master Odinson.” And you saw it then, beyond the insult and disloyalty masquerading as triumph; the last of the little boy who believed if he wished hard enough that things would be okay.

 

The part of him you would always love.

 

Even if you were hanging from the balcony, your limbs swaying in the breeze.

 

If only his uncertainty was enough to save him. Or you.

 

 

“My Lord!” His men were clambering up the long staircase now, coming to his irrelevant rescue, for the largest and biggest, most threatening traitor left.

 

The girl who had taught him to believe.

 

 

“It’s time.”

 

The words should have been his, but they came from your lips. He remained in one place, this time his eyes searching yours. For what, exactly?

 

Defeat? Surrender? Or perhaps acceptance?

 

Or maybe, the smallest piece of his heart beating; that you wouldn’t leave him?

 

“It’s been a hell of a ride, Loki.”

 

 

You could see in his eyes he was begging you to stop fighting, to come to his side as you always had, during his nightmares or his daydreams, to his rescue, to his joy, with your arms.

 

This time he wanted it. For you to be in his arms.

 

 

But if he broke character, took off that damned mask, for long enough to ask, it would already be centuries too late.

 

 

You walked to him, your face set with resolve, and his face changed; asking if you were going to put up one last fight.

 

“You dare lift a hand against me, Loki Laufeyson, the rightful King of Asguard?!”

 

“Yes.” And as he grabbed you by the shoulders in retaliation, you lifted the hand that had smoothed those silky locks over his forehead, and traced it one more time.

 

“(Y/n).” It was a whisper.

 

“There’s a Midguard story, nay a lore, that tells of a fairy who takes children to a land where they never grow old.”

 

“Neverland.” He had heard it.

 

“Maybe he was taking them to their end.”

 

“No.” His fingers tightened around you, hurting you.

 

“So they would never have to hurt again. So they would stay young, innocent, foolish.”

 

“No.” His voice was furious, desperate, but his grasp on you was slipping.

 

“Maybe Neverland is like heaven.”

 

And his hands slipped to his sides.

 

 

The guards clamored in, but he held up a hand.

 

“(Y/n) and I were just finishing.”

 

“That’s right.”

 

“In fact, give us some peace. We’re almost done.”

 

“But sire-“

 

“Now.”

 

And his men bowed and retreated back down the hall.

 

 

“Then again, maybe they could really fly.” It was your hands now, that made their way to his shoulders.

 

“Maybe.” His voice cracked, and his eyes dropped to the floor, staring at the feet that used to kick him awake in bed. When you were in dreamland and all the pretenses were dropped, and a part of you would lash out without your control, without your knowledge.

 

“Maybe if they really, really believed.”

 

“Yeah.”

 

 

It was time. Truly, time.

 

 

You stepped forward and tilted your chin towards the most handsome of all Princes, of all Gods. And as your lips almost met, they were both trembling.

 

“Tell me, Loki. Will you wish hard enough?” And you backed away, pulling yourself onto the windowsill.

 

“(Y/n)-“ And he choked, staring at you with horror.

 

“Let me know, Loki. In Neverland.”

 

“(Y/n)!!!” He was screaming but you were out of his grasp.

 

 

“Did I have wings?”

**Author's Note:**

> WAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH  
> ;ALSJF;ALSJDF;LASKJDF
> 
> LEAVE A COMMENTIF YOU ENJOYED!!
> 
> random ramblings:
> 
> this is beautiful. it also hurts. deeply.
> 
> the beginning is chibi-loki and you're like a nursemaid, only a few years older
> 
> the rest is loki-destruction/loki-finally-taken-over-asguard  
> you (obviously) didn't choose his side. he blames you for taking thor's side. when really, you just didn't go along with his bat-shit crazy psycho plan.
> 
> your price is life in prison. not death. just to make that clear. yeah. he got quite upset when you brought it up.
> 
> quick poll 1: which line made you cry?
> 
> quick poll 2: which line DESTROYED you?
> 
> quick poll 3: when did you realize what lovely was going to do?
> 
>  
> 
> The part of him you would always love.  
> Even if you were hanging from the balcony, your limbs swaying in the breeze.- FORESHADOWING. and also illustration. painful, beautiful, disturbing illustration.
> 
> this is one of my shortest random ramblings because this fic also took my heart and stomped on it.
> 
> that's all for this time lovelies!! give me some love below!! 
> 
> XOXO Bucky (Mindfucker the Lovely)
> 
> p.s. sorry. i know it hurts.


End file.
